he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Randomize
