tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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