Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
