I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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