Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
