drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
