And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
