is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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