i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
