Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Randomize