I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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