no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize