The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
