Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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