wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
