Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Randomize