I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I forgot how hot balto sounded
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
