Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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