Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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