YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
