i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
