Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
