Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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