she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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