it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
