Fine. I'll sleep in my office
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
