i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize