HIV tests are more positive than that guy
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize