I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
