roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize