Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
My Sexting was not on an AP level
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
