This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
jump out the window naked night went bad
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