Don't you send me to vm
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So much rum. So many feels.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
