He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
as a side note pls kill me
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
