He is an equal opportunity slut.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
