My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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