we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Randomize
