my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize
