Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
