you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
