It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
