NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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