SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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