I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
