Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
