I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
