We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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