did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
