are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
