What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
