home. puking in laundry basket.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
